Sunday, April 12, 2009

Male Secrets

From the myspace archives.

Male Secrets
(written July 10, 2008)

So, I went out to lunch with some friends today. This was mainly because I haven't seen one of them in months, and the other I haven't seen in weeks, and we haven't all three been in the same room since . . . well, since a long time ago. Anyway, Girl 2 and I are friends with Girl 3's boyfriend. He decided to tag along on our girls' lunch today. I am so very glad he did!

The unfortunate state of my life is that I go out on a lot of first dates that go nowhere. I'm not interested, he's not interested, we're both not interested, whatever. It happens and you move on. Well, because none of us have seen each other and gotten our girl talk in, that's what lunch was about. So, Girl 3 was asking me about the guy I had started seeing the last time I talked to her. And we moved on through a few months of first dates with occasional questions for clarification from Girl 2.

I was saying how there was one I was actually interested in, but I never heard back from him.

Me: So, a girl has to assume at some point he's not interested and move on. Right?
Girl 2: Or you waste five months on his loserdom.
Boyfriend: Well, maybe he's busy.
Girl 3: Stop playing Devil's advocate.
Me: Yeah!

Boyfriend asked about a few things concerning the potential interest and our outing. I answered. The girls clarified along the way.

Boyfriend: Okay, so he's probably not interested. BUT if he actually told you that, this conversation would be about "He's such a jerk! Oh my god! He actually said that?"

Now, I will admit here that he's right. I would have been saying something quite similar. Probably much more colorful with lots of adjectives thrown in. However, I was not going to admit defeat before I'd even been able to look at a menu!

Me: But I would at least appreciate the honesty! I mean, why do men tell you they want to see you again, and never call? What's the point? Don't do that! At the end of the night, you could just say "Yeah. Had a good time. Good night."
Boyfriend: Did he slip you tongue?
Me: What does that have to do with it?
Boyfriend: Okay. Well, if he slipped you the tongue, he's obligated to tell you the truth.

Why don't I know these things? Seriously, is there a rule book, an instruction manual, anything?? Because I need to know more of this stuff!

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