The Penis Has Returned
(written November 21, 2006)
You may recall that I wrote about my daughter's "penis" injury awhile back. Well, her talk of having a penis dissappeared since then. Thank God! And many sighs of relief were issued forth from the mother.
Only, it's back. As of yesterday, the mystery penis has returned.
Yesterday, the children were playing Superman. Both of them tied capes around their necks. Naturally, they needed to fly. My son decided that to be considered in flight, their capes had to be blowing behind them. And in order to do THAT, well, of course they had to run. While running at top speed through the house, my daughter falls. Even after my repeated warnings that if she continued to run, she would end up getting hurt, she still seemed suprised when it actually happened. Coming to me in tears, she sobs "I hurt my penis."
I can hear the cheesy horror movie music screaching in my head. "Honey, you don't have a penis," I reply. "Where does it hurt?" Pointing to her right butt cheek, she says "Right here." (Pronounced "Wight Heeeeeeeeeeeyaaaaaa") "Honey, that isn't a penis." If I thought she had been crying before, I thought wrong. Way wrong. "Yes, it is!" (Only it came out as "Yesitiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissssssss!" in a high-pitched little girl scream.) With a migraine coming on, I asked her what made her think she has a penis. The crying stopped. She looked at me like it was the stupidest question she'd ever heard. "My bruda has one."
So, I try to explain that boys have them and girls do not. She looks at me as if I'm the biggest joke in town. "You're so silly, Mommy." And she walks away laughing.
A minute later, I hear her telling the story to her brother in the next room. "Isn't Mommy silly?" she asked him. "No!" he yells at her. "I'm the only one with a penis!"
Oh, God.
No comments:
Post a Comment